Being married is hard. Aside from the skyrocketing divorce rates, seemingly inevitable financial struggles, and life’s unpredictable timeline of diagnosis, job loss, or trauma, intentionally agreeing to commit to one person forever is kind of a completely insane idea.
Of course, there is beauty in marriage—the honeymoon phase, the excitement of pregnancy and babies, the vacations, or the sweet little unmentionables like notes on the shower-steamed mirror before work. However, in my season of marriage, one that could currently be titled, “Parenting: That’s Literally All I Have Energy To Do”, marriage just seems hard. I imagine it might feel like that during other seasons in life as well.
In many of those seasons, the steamy notes take a backseat to loss or heartache, soccer games, and sickness.
After a friend mentioned this how often she and her husband have sex (at least four times a week), I was feeling a little “less than”—a state of being I can get lost in if I’m not careful. At that time, my husband and I would’ve felt victorious if we were together four times a month.
I mean where did they find the time!? They even have one more kid than we do!
So naturally, I pitched the idea to my husband. “Do you think we could do that? Have sex that often?” I questioned laughably because I know us.
“We can beat it,” he smiled.
And that’s why I married him, folks. He gets me.
That sealed it. We’d have sex everyday for a month. Thirty days. No exceptions.
Spoiler alert: we didn’t make it the full 30.
I don’t admit defeat often, but in this case, I learned some powerful lessons about love, motherhood, self-care, and strength that I’d likely never have uncovered without this playful challenge.
My husband and I, married nine years and together more than 13, have two kids. The oldest has several behavioral diagnosis, the youngest is 2-going-on-16, and that, my friends, is a recipe for a sexless existence. We also live tiny, so intimacy requires expert-level stealth and a certain level of preparedness beforehand.
For those reasons, the first few nights of our challenge felt forced.
To the mama who feels torn between desperately wanting to be intimate with her husband and her otherwise survivalist need to sleep because kids, I see you. Girl, I had to audibly coach myself to push through the wall of Tired Town and try my darndest to get in the mood.
Powering through that first week meant putting my husband’s needs and the commitment we’d made ahead of my desire to just give in to Netflix and sleep.
Toward the end of the first week, I began to get in a groove where it became exciting to look forward to see my husband coming home from work and have the anticipation of actually connecting once the kids were in bed. It wasn’t only about the act of sex. It was so much more as we made that time intentional. It became about intimacy in talking, asking questions, and reconnecting.
During the second week, I was shocked to find out just how difficult intimacy could really be when you’re actually trying. I mean, I have been with this man since I was 23. I barely remember existing in a life before he came into it. But when you’re forced to expose yourself, completely at your most vulnerable, the water can get murky.
Do I tell him what feels good? Do I look at him or keep my eyes closed? Should I say something?
This intentional focus on each other began conversations about topics we’d ignored. About my deep need to connect first in order to enjoy intimacy. Or his need to feel like he is pleasing me because that is where a big part of his enjoyment and fulfillment in our connection lies.
Week three was an absolute disaster. I won’t lie. Aunt Flo came early and, truthfully, I wasn’t mad about it. I mean, we are exceptionally fertile so that was a gift. A few days off and the knowledge we wouldn’t become parents of a third. Praise the Lord and hallelujah!
(Also, chill out, Karen. To each his own and I refuse to have sex while on my period. If that’s for you, get after it, girl! But ewwwww. Sorry.)
It was only in week four that I allowed myself to become empowered by the vulnerability in married intimacy. No longer would I stay enslaved to the fear or insecurity I had built up in my own mind.
I wouldn’t remain silent for my wants or needs. I wouldn’t hush my feelings, but instead listen to them, share them openly, and intentionally push through them alongside my husband instead of believing the lie that I was somehow saving him by staying quiet.
It never was my husband who put those feelings of fear or insecurity in me. Those had been planted deep inside through years of exposure to a world where expectations of beauty are run by the airbrush of mainstream media and the availability of pornography depicting sexual scenes never to be realistically recreated in actual love-making.
Do you know what happened? It opened a stream of conversation that needed to happen. It reminded me of all the reasons I loved my husband in the first place and added several more to that list. It proved that true, loving intimacy also provides safety, security, and a level of trust I’ve never known in any other relationship.
Giving ourselves the right to place a priority on intimacy paired with the grace to take a day off or choose the need for sleep was truly the best gift we’ve ever given each other in nine years of marriage. We bonded all over again. We learned new things. We allowed ourselves to be completely vulnerable. We started to look forward to each other again so prioritizing became easier.
And friends, it is making us more than better lovers, but better friends, better partners, and better parents. Show your kids how much you love each other. There is incredible freedom in that for you and security in your commitment to each other for your children.
Your open affection might seem gross to them at first. Laugh it off. It will show them that married intimacy is beautiful, not shameful. And they can rest in the confidence of their parents’ love as much as you can rest in each other.
Want to connect with other Extreme Parents in a judgement-free zone filled with encouragement? Consider becoming a Facebook Supporter!
Wow! This was a tough one to read – not because I think it’s beautiful that you challenged your intimacy level to be more but because I can’t help but seeing the lack in mine. Thank you for putting this out there. It is a call to be more vulnerable, open and honest with our partners.
Thank you so much! Sharing our journey in hopes that it will inspire others even when it is uncomfortable.
If you’re trying to catch your cheating spouse in the act, I strongly recommend ‘hackingloop6@ gmail com, this awesome hacker helped me monitor my husband’s phone. I got virtually every information my hubby has been hiding over the months easily right in my own phone. He can also improve credit cards, help you to withdraw your BTC, USDT, ETH or USDC. From any online trading platform.
RECOVER YOUR LOST CRYPTO ASSETS & IMPROVE YOUR CREDIT SCORE WITH ASORE HACK INTELLIGENCE. NO UPFRONT PAYMENT REQUIRED.
Asore Corp. is a team of Cyber Intelligence, Crypto Investigation, Asset Tracing and ethical hacking experts. Working together to form a private cyber and crypto intelligence group focused on providing results.
Using the latest Cyber Tools, Open Source Intelligence (OSINT), Human Intelligence (HUMINT), and cutting edge technology, we provide actionable intelligence to our clients.
WHY CHOOSE US?
– Expert Cyber Investigation Services —Our cyber investigators operate professionally and anonymously to crack all firewalls known to man.
– Cryptocurrency And Digital Asset Tracking — We are able to track the movement of different crypto currencies and assets. If the asset has been moved, we are able to follow it.
– Strategic Intelligence For Asset Recovery — The first step to recovery is locating recoverable assets. Our experienced team will be able to walk you through the process.
Schedule a mail session with our team of professionals today via – asorehackcorp (@) gmail (.) com to get started immediately.
BEWARE of FABRICATED reviews and testimonies endorsing tricksters, do not get scammed twice.
Disclaimer: Asore Corp. is not a law enforcement agency and not a law firm. Like all legitimate private investigators, we can guarantee specific results. We apply our expertise and resources to every case professionally and ethically.77
prompttechrecovery @ g m a i l c o m, came highly recommended. I have been working with them on getting my credit score been boosted across the Equifax, TransUnion and Experian report. they made a lot of good changes on my credit report by erasing all the past eviction, bad collections and DUI off my credit report history and also increased my FICO score above 876 across my three credit bureaus report. They also helped me in recovering my Bitcoin worth of $87,000, that i invested in a scam cryptocurrency company.
I was so deeply in love with a man that even after he began cheating on me I still wanted him back. but things didn’t work out between us as he chose to move on with the same person he was cheating on me with, and I got really hurt & went through those moments in which he left me. six weeks later i read a post in a relationship forum about a spell caster who helps people get back their lost love through Love spell and i just decide to contact the spell caster through email: swordofspirit096@gmail.com and explained my problem to him After 48 hours Dr. Intercessor returned my man to me not only that, we about getting married soon. All thanks to Dr Intercessor I highly recommend Dr. Intercessor to anyone in need of help to get your ex back. You can add him on WhatsApp via: +2347055029151
i am super excited this very moment indeed Dr Dominion is truly a good man, i doubted him from the beginning but right now i can trust him with my all because he has put a beautiful smile on my face and change my life from struggle to millionaire, what would i have done without him, just few months ago i was struggling wondering what would my life turn into, now i am here sharing a wonderful testimony of my life, after i explained my whole situation to him he took me as his own daughter and removed my family from shame, he prepared a lottery winning spell for me with true sincerity and gave me a winning number to play and that was how i won that jackpot, Dr Dominion took away my shame, my pain and my worries, what a humble man with a heart of gold, thank you so much i am very grateful for what you have done for me, should you have any interest in giving it a try or going through any difficulties i think he is the right man to talk to and i believe he can help
Email: dominionlottospelltemple@gmail.com
website: dominionlottospell.wixsite.com/dr-dominion
phone: +12059642462
I was searching for advise on what to do to get back my EX Husband, My story is about a woman who used to work with my husband in the same office, they were having secrete affairs and i caught them, for that reason my we had to split, but i still love him, but it seems he was deeply in lover with the other lady and he left me useless, after few weeks of searching for help, I came across Dr.Akpos who helped me, i contacted Dr.Akpos for help due to the fact that i needed my EX lover desperately because he is my everything and my life. To God be the glory, my EX husband came back to me within 48 hours and he swore never to cheat on me again and promised to love me forever, Viewers reading my article that also need his help should contact him with his email:( Akpossolutionhome@gmail.com
) call or Whatsapp +2347050270227. He will solve your relationship problem…
I am here to say all i experienced with Dr Isikolo just like everyone else who is grateful would do. Dr Isikolo saved my marriage and it happened just like a miracle. For a very long time, I have issues with my husband and he became very distant from me and that alone worries me a lot. Family and friends did all they could to help the situation but to no avail. Days became week and weeks became months and months became two years plus. I knew I had to seek help. So I contacted Dr Isikolo and he offered willingly to help me which he did. He resolved the situation and the love and connection I and my husband shared, was restored and it all happened like a miracle. Now we do everything together and the kids are so happy that I never left and Dr Isikolo is all I have to thank for the full support and making my family happy and whole again. contact him on his WhatsApp +2348133261196.
I was going through a rough time in my life and it greatly affected my union with my wife. We had so many emotional problems and struggles and this alone made us pay less attention to each other’s need. While i was on it trying to fix my problems and get back on my feet so that i can reshape my marriage and make it work better, my wife had women around her that influenced her wrongly and made her took the wrong part by walking away. That incident alone broke me and i was sure she wasnt doing everything she doing with her right senses. I did what i can to restore peace but it never worked and i had to Contact Dr Isikolo who made it possible for me fix the problem. He worked for me and restored back the love and connection between me and my wife and she returne back home. The result of his work started manifesting just after 48 hours as promised and i can bold say everything is fine between us now and we are both happy together, I am here to validate the information out there that Dr Isikolo is a good and honest man that you can trust to help you with your problems. His webpage: https://isikolo-temple.com, you can as well text him via WhatsApp +234-8133261196
Hello everyone am Gary Van I want to use this medium to appreciate a great spell caster called Dr Ogaga that transformed my life financially, I used to work as driver in a company and I always play lotto but I have never been lucky, then one day as I was glancing through the Internet I came across a testimony of a woman who won $600million through the help of a strong spell caster called Dr Ogaga after praying for her he gave her a lucky numbers to play and she won 600,000,000$ I also decided to try my luck I contacted the Dr Ogaga and he promise he was going to help me win too I didn’t actually believed 100% but on the second thought I decided to give it a try He instructed me on what I need to do which I did with no stress at all, then after two day he sent me some numbers and asked me to go and play them I went strait to the store and play the numbers then I went back to check when the results were out, behold my numbers came out as the winning numbers it was like a dream to me, even till now I still fined it difficult to believe that I am now a millionaire from being a driver to being a millionaire all thank to Dr Ogaga I will never forget your help, if you are out there and you also want to be a winner I will advice you to also contact Dr Ogaga and I promise you he will not disappoint you at all. Here are his contacts. Email ogagaodia41@gmail.com
WhatsApp +1(365)350-5955.
I lost $729K USD worth of BTC after my Cold Card wallet was hacked few days ago, who would have thought that could’ve happened ? Well, it did and it ruined my financial situation immediately. I was left in shambles and I was disoriented. I happen to stumble a post on Twitter about a writer who had been in similar situation, then I realized the hack was huge as over $100m was lost to this cold card wallet hack. I contacted one of the victims on Twitter who was able to recover their wallet and BTC funds with the help of Morphohack Cyber Service, a crypto and funds recovery service, Morphohack Was able to offer the same services to me, and within a few hours after contacting Morphohack, my wallet and BTC was recovered. After the hack, I thought all was gone for good but I’m astonished that a team like Morphohack is out there helping victims of crypto loss recover their money. I highly recommend them (Morphohack@cyberservices. com) they are very trustworthy and reliable.