Moms are Carriers and Our Arms are Tired.
There are awesome dads,
and mentors we love…
But it feels like moms are carrying EVERYTHING for EVERYONE lately,
and We. Are. Exhausted.
When we decided to have kids, we knew there would be times that would likely be hard and seasons of difficulty in parenthood, but we never imagined what it would look like to parent during a pandemic.
Friends, we’re a year into some level of quarantine and major up-endings of what we previously knew as ‘normal life’ and moms are still carrying the majority of the weight.
And I’m willing to say what we’re all feeling and many are thinking but no one will voice:
This is not okay.
Like teachers who have just been expected to figure out how to instruct their students in a completely different way overnight, moms haven’t been cut any slack and what is being expected of us is just too much.
Many moms are being asked to
work from home,
manage meetings and snack times,
virtual school and varying emotions,
monitor mental health and make meals.
We are supposed to be single parents,
Or navigate co-parenting,
Or figure out how to maintain a marriage,
Or work out not having enough support.
We are trying to figure out how to keep
Our kids going,
Our households on track,
Our jobs moving forward,
Our finances in check.
And still somehow we are to do all of this and manage self-care.
There is no time for us when everyone else…everything else…didn’t stop when the world did.
The needs grew but our time didn’t.
Our abilities didn’t.
Our emotional capacity didn’t.
Our mental wellness didn’t.
And many of us are So. Tired.
Friends, I don’t have an answer to help us get the rest we so desperately need.
I don’t have a way to whisk us all to a deserted island where no one needs dinner made or laundry folded or a ride to practice or talked down from the meltdowns of virtual school.
It’s all still there.
But I just needed to shout out to the mamas whose arms are bruised and battered, worn and weary from carrying all the things for everyone.
I wish I was your neighbor and I could lighten the load for you,
Bring you a meal so you didn’t have to think of dinner,
Watch your kiddos so you could nap or run or read a book,
Come clean your kitchen while you just watch Netflix.
Because that is what we need, friends.
We need each other.
We need each other to give grace.
We need each other to start understanding that we are all in similar boats right now…
Not the same boats, but similar.
Some of us are driving fishing boats without nets,
Some have yachts but ran out of fuel,
Others are paddling a canoe with a stick and it’s on fire.
But it’s all still hard.
Because we don’t know what we’re doing…not really.
And none of us signed up for THIS.
Dealing with difficulty? Sure.
Pandemic parenting? No way.
So, smile wider.
Offer to help.
Fix the meal.
Because no one will regret extending kindness and you will never know what an impact one act of love can mean to a mom whose arms can’t carry it all anymore.