The beginning of each new year gives me anxiety. Full disclosure, by the end of any year, I have fully given up on any semblance of a diet I had previously attempted. You are likely to find me any day in December, buried in a pile of gift wrap and regret with a half eaten cheese ball in front of me and some Christmas cookie icing on my face. The family, the traveling, the presents, the wrapping, the parties, the budget, the freaking Elf; It is all just too much.
So I did what any rational thinking adult would do. I quit. Why torture myself with the reminders of why I am a failure, despite my desperate attempts to grasp at anything resembling a healthy lifestyle and acceptable presentation of mothering I can muster?
Here are six reasons why I refuse to make resolutions:
I Don’t Like To Fail
This is the same reason why my husband won’t teach me new things anymore. I don’t like to be anything but the best at things…like, immediately after trying them the first time. It doesn’t matter if I was a size 2 (transparency alert: I am a 2X), you can always find weight you have to lose. And no one can be the perfect mom. No one. I do not care how excellently your Pinterest-perfect, gluten free, Mickey-themed Christmas cookies turned out. Nope. Girl, I know you threw some mess into the closet before the house guests arrived. We’ve all done it! So why set myself up for failure? No ma’am. I will not do it.
Everyday Doesn’t Deserve to Be A Monday
When (and not if) I mess up, it becomes a go big or go home situation. “I shouldn’t have eaten that Hershey kiss. I guess I might as well eat the deluxe burrito at dinner with three baskets of chips and queso and start over tomorrow.” So, the cycle continues and I start over the next day. Sister, what did Thursday ever do to you!? Let each day be their own and not make every day for the first two weeks of January turn into a month of Mondays until you throw in the proverbial chocolate-covered towel anyway.
I Choose Peace Over Anxiety
As a mother who struggles with anxiety while my husband and I parent two kids (one with extreme behavior disorders), I wholly believe someone should be throwing me a mother of the freaking year parade every night when I go to bed with two living children, still married, and without having consumed an entire box of wine from Target. Mommin’ is no joke. It’s messy and hard and I haven’t showered in three days. I choose peace. I refuse to subject myself to the barrage of self-destructive thoughts that will haunt me all night if I attempt to take on a ‘whole new me’ just because of the date on the calendar.
So I resolve to do things that serve me like read a new book. Here‘s the list of my Top 10 Recommended Reads for 2020.
The Gym Shouldn’t Feel Like Punishment
When I take my plus-sized rear end to the gym, people should be high-fiving me on my way in. “Way to go!” “Get it, mama!” But, instead, those of us who struggle with our weight feel stared at and judged in most gym environments. I need to want to go to the gym. When I go now, I have the support of my husband (who happens to be fit and handsome) and our kids love it. So, why would I want to tarnish a good thing with the feeling of impending doom when I sign myself up for fitness classes with spandex-clad fitness mamas and I am just doing my best not to engage in conversation since I can barely breathe! Yeah, I’ll pass.
Diet Should Be Synonymous With Lifestyle
Unlike what my figure suggests, I actually have a lot of nutrition and diet knowledge. For me, if I attempt fad diets, it is always short-lived. Who can (or wants) to live a life without pasta? Um, no thank you! Plus, if you are telling me I can’t have cheese, I don’t need that kind of negativity in my life. Get out! I prefer to pass up the “no carb” resolution in exchange for updating my meal plan, meal prep, and grocery shopping plans. This allows my entire family to gain the health benefits and doesn’t make me feel deprived.
If I Constantly Fail, I Won’t Ever Really Appreciate Myself For What I Can Do
I have gained and lost the same 60 pounds probably a dozen times. I am currently on the upswing of my weight, but I fluctuate. Plus, when you carry extra, a 10 pound differential is hard to notice. What I do notice is how I feel. When I am doing something active, I feel like I should be able to do what my formerly fit body could have accomplished. But when I am fit, I see myself in the overweight body I currently wear. It is healthier to be grateful for what I do have. I have a body that can get me around. I have a healthy report from the doctor. I have a beautiful, healthy family that loves me even though I wear sweats way too often and there is nothing about our house or our life that even closely resembles a glittery Pinterest success. So, I pick this life.
Happy New Year, folks! I will be over here with a box of wine, eating cheese and bacon, resolving myself to not make resolutions and BEING AWESOME! Relax, mama. Excuse yourself from the pressure and you will still be amazing. I promise!
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16 Replies to “Six Reasons Why I Refuse To Make Resolutions”
We have opposite beliefs on resolutions, but I understand your reasons. Resolutions are tough, but i think the key is to make things achievable wth a good plan on how to do it.
I’ve given up on the “diet resolution” too. I am trying to work in more.ohysocal activity, but o also like cake. Life is balance ????
These are good reasons not to make resolutions, but I think one resolution we both CAN make is to stop being so anxious and just enjoy life! I can relate though to not wanting to fail. Failing for me makes me very anxious and ashamed too.
I really like your post. I feel that yearly resolutions do not help at all, and that we should try to accomplish our goals all the time and not only at the beginning of the year. Thanks for sharing.
Some good reasons for avoiding resolutions! Well thought out post. <a href="https://shirleycorder.com/attitude_of_gratitude/" Attitude of Gratitude
I like your spirit! I agree that we should not prison ourselves with resolutions and should rather take each day as it comes. Even I tried a fad diet, which is KETO diet, but I couldn’t sustain it. How long could I have stayed with better food?
I completely understand you and have never made any New Year’s resolutions.
Loved it! Found you on bloggers nest and my favorite point was picking peace over anxiety which we tend to do a lot! I’ll be keeping a lot of these in mind for 2018. Great post ????
YES to ALL of this! There is enough to be anxious about; there is zero reason to add to it. Anything that feels like punishment (gym, diet, learning to knit) isn’t worth your peace of mind.
I really like your take on this. I can see a lot of trends that you spoke about (everyday shouldn’t be Monday. The gym shouldn’t be a punishment) in my previous years of failed New Years resolutions. I am looking foward to still doing them, but it’s important to have the right mindset when choosing them. As always, I absolutely adore you’re personality ❤️ Have a wonderful New Years!
I don’t make them, either, for many of the same reasons.
I’m no longer a fan of the resolution, I just try and achieve what I want all year round. Some days I may fail but not everyday. Great post.
This is wonderful. I am already on cheat day #2 of my new lifestyle. lmao! Im the worst resolutionist on the planet, so I will just do what you do & skip out! 🙂