Friends, I have to be honest.
If you’d have asked me in those super cool yearbook interviews as I graduated high school, “Where do you think you’ll be in 20 years?” I ASSURE you my answer wasn’t:
Married for 100 years (estimation),
Two kids, one with 6 mental health diagnoses,
Battling my own mental health,
In grad school to switch to my THIRD career,
Moving for the seventh time in 9 years,
And about to live in graduate townhouses to save money…
Y’all, life is kicking my entire tail lately.
Covid, job losses, career switching, diagnoses, saving, moving, renting, selling, and all while trying to maintain some semblance of normalcy as a wife, a mama, a friend, a woman…
I. Am. Dead.
So today, I tried something.
Instead of dragging my fully exhausted, yoga pants clad hind end around until it was time for the parent pick-up line, I chose to be grateful.
Tuesdays are girl’s days in our house. Big brother goes to school and dad rides his motorcycle to work until late and we just hang out being awesome girls. Sometimes we have a breakfast date and share a kid’s meal to save cash.
Some days we hike to a waterfall or build fairy gardens in the park.
Many days she beats me at whatever game she chooses and I am not even letting her win. She’s savage.
We watch movies, sing loudly, have dance parties, and eat delicious food without being interrupted by boys.
It’s pretty amazing, honestly.
So, today I choose that.
I’m grateful for how hilarious, feisty, and generous my wild little girl is and how much she absolutely loves even the simplest parts of life.
I’m grateful that moments with her are beautiful and kind and low-key in a way that seems foreign because I’ve spent the previous nine years raising a child who battles behaviors…and that’s okay for me to feel all of that.
I will plant strawberries and get dirt under my finders and be truly present.
No paying bills.
No returning emails.
No meeting deadlines.
Because sometimes the best memories are the ones we make by accident under leafy trees, with pancakes and belly laughs.
Being present isn’t my spiritual gift, friends.Trust me. I am a planner, a make-it-happener, a can’t-relax-er, a list-making color-coded calender-er. But not today.
Today, I choose peace and I hope you will too, even if only for a few minutes.